1. I think the whole story being told in the second person view is kind of annoying. It doesn't really work out well because it gets kind of confusing. She talks about how she was in her English class in high school with HER teacher named Mr. Killian but she is the one who had him as a teacher, not us, so the whole concept of the story being told in the second person point of view is kind of annoying.
2. My two favorite parts would have to be …
I. As a child psychology major, you have some electives. You've always liked birds. Sign up for something called "The Ornithological Field Trip." It meets Tuesdays and Thursdays at two. When you arrive at Room 134 on the first day of class, everyone is sitting around a seminar table talking about metaphors. You've heard of these. After a short, excruciating while, raise your hand and say diffidently, "Excuse me, isn't this Bird-watching One-oh-one?" The class stops and turns to look at you. They seem to all have one face--giant and blank as a vandalized clock. Someone with a beard booms out, "No, this is Creative Writing." Say: "Oh--right," as if perhaps you knew all along. Look down at your schedule. Wonder how the hell you ended up here. The computer, apparently, has made an error. You start to get up to leave and then don't.
I like this part because if I was in her position I would have done the same thing as well. I would have walked in the wrong room, asked what class this is and would’ve have been like “Oh, right” as well. I also would have just stayed there too, just so I wouldn’t look like an idiot in front of everyone.
II. Write a short story about an elderly man and woman who accidentally shoot each other in the head, the result of an inexplicable malfunction of a shotgun which appears mysteriously in their living room one night. Give it to Mr. Killian as your final project. When you get it back, he has written on it: "Some of your images are quite nice, but you have no sense of plot." When you are home, in the privacy of your own room, faintly scrawl in pencil beneath his black-inked comments: "Plots are for dead people, pore-face."
I like this part as well because I can relate to this too. I’m not the best writer, so whenever I hand in something for English, my teachers have always told me to keep adding more and more when I don’t know what more to write.
3. I think Lorrie Moore is trying to say that you can write about anything you want as long as it is creative. I know this because in her story, she is writing about random stuff, but it capture’s the reader’s attention which shows the story is interesting.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
Mudlavia
1. Some conflicts in the story are that …
• The boy’s knee is hurt. He has to go to some treatment spa in Indiana called Mudlavia.
• He finds out that his dad is cheating on his mom.
• His mom runs away.
• He has to get his leg removed because he has a problem in his knee.
2. I crawled underneath the bed and curled up in a ball. Mother finally found me there when she came in. "My God!" she said. "What's happened?" She kneeled in front of the bed, sounding satisfyingly terrified.
This quote shows that his mom wasn’t very caring because she was to busy talking to somebody else even though her son was in pain.
“You sure?" he kept asking me. "She didn't talk to any men?"
I never mentioned Harry Jones to anyone. I told myself that I was keeping our secret, and that Mother wouldn't have wanted me to blab, but that was only part of it. Harry Jones seemed like a fantasy, a figment of our imagination, and I didn't want to expose him to the harsh light of conventional Lafayette. Besides, she could've gone anywhere, with anyone.
"None?" my father said again. "No men at all?"
This quote shows that his mom and dad are not trust worthy. His dad kept asking if his mom was talking to any men. Also, while they were away at Mudlavia, Dottie wrote a letter saying he saw his dad with his cousin in Indianapolis and how she is a stylish lady. This also shows how the dad isn’t trustworthy either.
3. She created suspense in the story by adding lots of details and being real specific.
4. “You sure?" he kept asking me. "She didn't talk to any men?"
I never mentioned Harry Jones to anyone. I told myself that I was keeping our secret, and that Mother wouldn't have wanted me to blab, but that was only part of it. Harry Jones seemed like a fantasy, a figment of our imagination, and I didn't want to expose him to the harsh light of conventional Lafayette. Besides, she could've gone anywhere, with anyone.
"None?" my father said again. "No men at all?"
This part is a strong part because it shows how the parents are very trustworthy. It ties the story together because after this part, the mother ends up running away.
In the late summer I always remember Mudlavia, and not with any bad feelings. I remember the gurgling fountain and the hollyhocks, the wide porch, the soggy baked Alaska. Buster saying, in his southern drawl, "Relax and get well." Harry whispering, "This place is a con game." I remember lying beneath the mud, soaking it up, the stillness and the smell and the flies buzzing, forgetting myself, forgetting that I was even a human being with all the worries and vanities and self-deception that go along with it, and I think that if I could've stayed there forever, buried in mud, I might've had a happy life, instead of simply a good one.
This part of the story is a strong part to because it sums up basically what goes on in Mudlavia. The last sentence showed that he didn’t really like Mudlavia and that it didn’t help him with his knee problem.
• The boy’s knee is hurt. He has to go to some treatment spa in Indiana called Mudlavia.
• He finds out that his dad is cheating on his mom.
• His mom runs away.
• He has to get his leg removed because he has a problem in his knee.
2. I crawled underneath the bed and curled up in a ball. Mother finally found me there when she came in. "My God!" she said. "What's happened?" She kneeled in front of the bed, sounding satisfyingly terrified.
This quote shows that his mom wasn’t very caring because she was to busy talking to somebody else even though her son was in pain.
“You sure?" he kept asking me. "She didn't talk to any men?"
I never mentioned Harry Jones to anyone. I told myself that I was keeping our secret, and that Mother wouldn't have wanted me to blab, but that was only part of it. Harry Jones seemed like a fantasy, a figment of our imagination, and I didn't want to expose him to the harsh light of conventional Lafayette. Besides, she could've gone anywhere, with anyone.
"None?" my father said again. "No men at all?"
This quote shows that his mom and dad are not trust worthy. His dad kept asking if his mom was talking to any men. Also, while they were away at Mudlavia, Dottie wrote a letter saying he saw his dad with his cousin in Indianapolis and how she is a stylish lady. This also shows how the dad isn’t trustworthy either.
3. She created suspense in the story by adding lots of details and being real specific.
4. “You sure?" he kept asking me. "She didn't talk to any men?"
I never mentioned Harry Jones to anyone. I told myself that I was keeping our secret, and that Mother wouldn't have wanted me to blab, but that was only part of it. Harry Jones seemed like a fantasy, a figment of our imagination, and I didn't want to expose him to the harsh light of conventional Lafayette. Besides, she could've gone anywhere, with anyone.
"None?" my father said again. "No men at all?"
This part is a strong part because it shows how the parents are very trustworthy. It ties the story together because after this part, the mother ends up running away.
In the late summer I always remember Mudlavia, and not with any bad feelings. I remember the gurgling fountain and the hollyhocks, the wide porch, the soggy baked Alaska. Buster saying, in his southern drawl, "Relax and get well." Harry whispering, "This place is a con game." I remember lying beneath the mud, soaking it up, the stillness and the smell and the flies buzzing, forgetting myself, forgetting that I was even a human being with all the worries and vanities and self-deception that go along with it, and I think that if I could've stayed there forever, buried in mud, I might've had a happy life, instead of simply a good one.
This part of the story is a strong part to because it sums up basically what goes on in Mudlavia. The last sentence showed that he didn’t really like Mudlavia and that it didn’t help him with his knee problem.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
short story
First Draft; Short Story
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” I said rushing out of the house. “Hurry up you slowpoke! My mom’s waiting in the car!” Ashley said screaming at me on the phone as I put my Uggs on. As I barely finished putting my Ugg’s on, I glanced in the mirror quickly and ran out of the house with my cell phone in one hand and my coach bag in the other.
“Bye mom!” I shouted at the top of my lungs right before the door shut behind me. It was 3:56 P.M, really sunny outside but kind of chilly. Ashley and I were going to the mall, how we did once a month. Just us two so we could catch up on what was going on in our lives. The thing was that Ashley and I both lived in different neighborhoods and we both went to different schools. Ashley used to go to my school but then she had to move. Thank god it wasn’t that far though. We had been best friends since the 2nd grade, basically sisters. Every month, we would hang out at the mall and catch up on each other lives. I would tell her about my boyfriend, Bobby and she would tell me about how she had a huge crush on some guy at her school named Spencer.
Bobby and I had been together for about 8 months. I wouldn’t say we were in love, but we were getting there. Bobby was a year older than me, but we went to the same school. Him and Ashley had been good friends too, so it was all perfect. As we were in the car with Jane, Ashley’s mom she was talking to me and asking how my family and everything in my life was.
“How’s school?” she said while the radio was playing behind her voice.
“Good, but it would be better if Ashley was back here though.” I said in sarcastic voice. For a few minutes, there was a silence.
“Well girls, tell me when you want me to pick you up. Have fun!” Jane said right before we jumped out of the car.
Right when we walked into the mall, we went to the usual stores … in order, Abercrombie & Fitch, Dylan’s Candy Bar, Hollister, Wild Pair and Forever 21 and then we would go eat lunch and grab us some tall double chocolate chip frappachino’s from Starbucks.
As we walked by Haagan Daz, I would think of Bobby because I knew he always loved it. While we were walking by the ice cream store I saw a boy that looked just like Bobby smiling as he talked to a girl. I couldn’t really see the face so I moved closer and … my worst nightmare had came true. It was Bobby and he was talking to another girl, smiling and laughing. Not only was that some girl, it was Vanessa Robins. My enemy. We hated each other the first day we made eye contact. I couldn’t stand that girl being in my presence.
But all the joy that was taken off my face, was on his. I dropped my frappachino and ran away. Ashley, following behind me trying to catch up to my speed kept saying, “…Calm down! It’s probably a misunderstanding. Trust me, everything will be okay.”
So many thoughts went through my mind as I ran toward the bathroom.
What did I do to deserve this? Is this revenge for something I did? I didn’t know what to think. Everything was so confusing. As I shut the stall door in Ashley’s face, weeping to myself she ran outside and began to search for Bobby… and that other girl.
“What are you talking about?! I didn’t talk to any girl! She was talking to us! I was with Mike and Jon!” Bobby said screaming at Ashley’s face.
“Why were you talking her Bobby?!” Ashely said screaming back.
“You know she hates Vanessa!”
“Where is she?! This is ridiculous!” Bobby said walking away.
I was watching this behind the window of Abercrombie. The whole fight, going back and forth and back and forth.
“She obviously doesn’t want to talk to you!” Ashley said.
I kept thinking… YES I DO! WHAT IS SHE SAYING! OF COURSE I WANT TO TALK TO HIM!
* * *
Right when I got home, I had about 17 missed calls and 9 new text messages and 2 voicemails. But I didn’t respond, there was no point. It wasn’t the fact that he was talking to a girl. It just bothered me that he knew I didn’t like her, yet he still talked to her. If he was yelling at her, I wouldn’t care … but he was laughing and smiling which made the whole situation a lot worse. It was 9:00 P.M and I was in bed because I was in the worst mood possible. I didn’t want to talk to anybody. I hated everyone and everything.
The next morning I woke up around 11:30 AM. I had about 14 texts and 5 missed calls. I went downstairs, made myself breakfast. My mom and dad were at work and my brother was at school. I didn’t know what to do so I went to the dining room and began watching TV. Nothing good was on. Could this day get any worse?!
At about 1:56 P.M I had received a text message from Bobby. It said…
“I’m sorry for everything I did, it was all a big misunderstanding. Please open your door. I hope you forgive me.”
I opened the front door and their lie and huge teddy bear, at least 4 ½ feet tall, with a box of chocolates and a card. Right when I saw it, I gasped. I opened the card and it said…
Rene –
Whatever happened the other day, was a big misunderstanding. That girl started talking to me. Mike, John and I were laughing at her, not smiling with her. I’m sorry you took everything the wrong way. I meant no harm in hurting you.
I hope you accept this and forget about the whole thing.
With love,
Bobby
As I read this, little tears began to roll down my eyes. My heart was finally at a normal pace and I had a huge grin on my face. I was so relieved that nothing bad had happened between Bobby and I. I walked in the house with a huge teddy bear and chocolates up to my room. A few minutes later, someone rang the door bell. It was Bobby with 12 roses in his hand.
“Forgive me?” he said in a soft voice.
I ran up to him and gave him the biggest hug ever.
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” I said rushing out of the house. “Hurry up you slowpoke! My mom’s waiting in the car!” Ashley said screaming at me on the phone as I put my Uggs on. As I barely finished putting my Ugg’s on, I glanced in the mirror quickly and ran out of the house with my cell phone in one hand and my coach bag in the other.
“Bye mom!” I shouted at the top of my lungs right before the door shut behind me. It was 3:56 P.M, really sunny outside but kind of chilly. Ashley and I were going to the mall, how we did once a month. Just us two so we could catch up on what was going on in our lives. The thing was that Ashley and I both lived in different neighborhoods and we both went to different schools. Ashley used to go to my school but then she had to move. Thank god it wasn’t that far though. We had been best friends since the 2nd grade, basically sisters. Every month, we would hang out at the mall and catch up on each other lives. I would tell her about my boyfriend, Bobby and she would tell me about how she had a huge crush on some guy at her school named Spencer.
Bobby and I had been together for about 8 months. I wouldn’t say we were in love, but we were getting there. Bobby was a year older than me, but we went to the same school. Him and Ashley had been good friends too, so it was all perfect. As we were in the car with Jane, Ashley’s mom she was talking to me and asking how my family and everything in my life was.
“How’s school?” she said while the radio was playing behind her voice.
“Good, but it would be better if Ashley was back here though.” I said in sarcastic voice. For a few minutes, there was a silence.
“Well girls, tell me when you want me to pick you up. Have fun!” Jane said right before we jumped out of the car.
Right when we walked into the mall, we went to the usual stores … in order, Abercrombie & Fitch, Dylan’s Candy Bar, Hollister, Wild Pair and Forever 21 and then we would go eat lunch and grab us some tall double chocolate chip frappachino’s from Starbucks.
As we walked by Haagan Daz, I would think of Bobby because I knew he always loved it. While we were walking by the ice cream store I saw a boy that looked just like Bobby smiling as he talked to a girl. I couldn’t really see the face so I moved closer and … my worst nightmare had came true. It was Bobby and he was talking to another girl, smiling and laughing. Not only was that some girl, it was Vanessa Robins. My enemy. We hated each other the first day we made eye contact. I couldn’t stand that girl being in my presence.
But all the joy that was taken off my face, was on his. I dropped my frappachino and ran away. Ashley, following behind me trying to catch up to my speed kept saying, “…Calm down! It’s probably a misunderstanding. Trust me, everything will be okay.”
So many thoughts went through my mind as I ran toward the bathroom.
What did I do to deserve this? Is this revenge for something I did? I didn’t know what to think. Everything was so confusing. As I shut the stall door in Ashley’s face, weeping to myself she ran outside and began to search for Bobby… and that other girl.
“What are you talking about?! I didn’t talk to any girl! She was talking to us! I was with Mike and Jon!” Bobby said screaming at Ashley’s face.
“Why were you talking her Bobby?!” Ashely said screaming back.
“You know she hates Vanessa!”
“Where is she?! This is ridiculous!” Bobby said walking away.
I was watching this behind the window of Abercrombie. The whole fight, going back and forth and back and forth.
“She obviously doesn’t want to talk to you!” Ashley said.
I kept thinking… YES I DO! WHAT IS SHE SAYING! OF COURSE I WANT TO TALK TO HIM!
* * *
Right when I got home, I had about 17 missed calls and 9 new text messages and 2 voicemails. But I didn’t respond, there was no point. It wasn’t the fact that he was talking to a girl. It just bothered me that he knew I didn’t like her, yet he still talked to her. If he was yelling at her, I wouldn’t care … but he was laughing and smiling which made the whole situation a lot worse. It was 9:00 P.M and I was in bed because I was in the worst mood possible. I didn’t want to talk to anybody. I hated everyone and everything.
The next morning I woke up around 11:30 AM. I had about 14 texts and 5 missed calls. I went downstairs, made myself breakfast. My mom and dad were at work and my brother was at school. I didn’t know what to do so I went to the dining room and began watching TV. Nothing good was on. Could this day get any worse?!
At about 1:56 P.M I had received a text message from Bobby. It said…
“I’m sorry for everything I did, it was all a big misunderstanding. Please open your door. I hope you forgive me.”
I opened the front door and their lie and huge teddy bear, at least 4 ½ feet tall, with a box of chocolates and a card. Right when I saw it, I gasped. I opened the card and it said…
Rene –
Whatever happened the other day, was a big misunderstanding. That girl started talking to me. Mike, John and I were laughing at her, not smiling with her. I’m sorry you took everything the wrong way. I meant no harm in hurting you.
I hope you accept this and forget about the whole thing.
With love,
Bobby
As I read this, little tears began to roll down my eyes. My heart was finally at a normal pace and I had a huge grin on my face. I was so relieved that nothing bad had happened between Bobby and I. I walked in the house with a huge teddy bear and chocolates up to my room. A few minutes later, someone rang the door bell. It was Bobby with 12 roses in his hand.
“Forgive me?” he said in a soft voice.
I ran up to him and gave him the biggest hug ever.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
intro
2:35 P.M. The school bell rings and all you hear are people talking louder than ever, the shuffling of papers and the pitter patter of everyone running and walking out of school because today was Friday, the Friday before Spring Break. As I walked home, with my two best friends since 4th grade, Nicole and Kristi we talked about what we were doing over break and how Nicole was going to Mexico and Kristi was going on a cruise to Jamaica and I wasn’t going anywhere. I was fine with staying home, but knowing that my best friends weren’t going to be here was really annoying. As we walked to my house like we did every Friday, we saw Megan, Jen, Rachel and Sabrina in Sabrina’s car with her mom going to Sabrina’s house. I knew where Sabrina lived because she was my neighbor; those four girls were the most popular girls in our grade. Kristi, Nicole and I called them the Fab Four. They weren’t actually called that but we just called them that. Sabrina and I used to be friends in 2nd grade up to 5th grade but as we got to middle school, things changed. Anyways, the Fab Four… they had everything, the pretty faces, the nice bodies, the clothes and everything.
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